Rude dinner guests? Give them the boot! But before you do, offer to help them put on their shoes. This haraKIRI cobra shoehorn is designed to get people quickly out of your house. Or kill them. Because, if angled wrong, this silent ankle biter will have your company dead on the front porch. “Honey, we need the shovels again.”

I don’t care what you might have seen in movies, always dig graves in the backyard; not the front, and gardening past midnight will likely wake up the whole bloody condo. The next thing you know, you’re being chewed out at the monthly tenants meeting. And it has nothing to do with peeing in the elevators. Hey, it’s not like I’m taking number 2′s in there. The laundry room has much better reading material.

An eye catching wallet by accessories specialists Obelisk. Intricate pattens and textures cover this entire wallet. The reptile skin and micro-detailed artwork blend together in rich colors and style.

But a word of warning: this wallet only accepts platinum credit cards and stacks of crisp hundreds. Yes, I tried to fit in a bus pass and some loose change. It was a definite no-go.

I guess l’ll just have to make use of my George Costanza inspired mini-accordion wallet for a little while longer. Well, until my Nigerian friend gets back from validating my savings account. Oh hush. I’ll let you in on the scheme after I chrome my first Enzo. 

Another stunning design by Yasuyuki Ishii. This time he’s constructed a pair of post-apocalyptic looking leather boots through meticulous patchwork and sewing. These are the boots a fashion conscious road warrior from the future would wear as he saves a town from a traveling band of ex-WWE stars. Sorry, did I say stars?

Anyway, these boots look like they could really kick some ass, but I’d be careful wearing them up Mt. Fuji or someplace. Sherpas would undoubtably make a grab for them in your sleep, leaving you to ride the escalator up with the rest of the old people and Uniqlo staff. They must have a Uniqlo up there by now.

TroisO has released this incredible bracelet that comes with all sorts of fine details forged into its silver links. This bracelet is a part of the Think Balance collection, which asks us to evaluate our lives from the ying-yang philosophy of the East.

Speaking of balance, wearing this hefty piece on your wrist would definitely warp your posture. Being way too cheap to buy a second one, your best bet would be to hold a dumbbell in your other hand while politely telling your driving instructor that it’s the only way to stop driving around in circles. But after displaying your mastery of the continuous U-turn, he seems unimpressed, and you’re forced to boast about your knowledge of NASCAR. He still fails you, but that doesn’t stop you from driving school buses. Man, some people just don’t understand Japanese streetwear at all!

Dress for comfort, but don’t forget about style! IZREEL has produced this suave new track jacket with many fine details. Carefully chosen colors and fabric, will guarantee this coat to look anything but ordinary. It’s not exactly cheap at around $400, but that hasn’t stopped this hot item from selling out.

I don’t see how the Japanese can afford so much gear. I mean, after personal robots, giant manga collections, and a hefty pachinko budget, where do they cough up the dough to look so trendy? Maybe it’s video games. Maybe the score you get when you play Capcom’s Knights of The Round is what the Japanese get paid in Yen. And for all these years we’ve been plugging our quarters away just to write C.O.K. in the high scores.